Is perfectionism a symptom of adhd?: 3 differences, overlaps and ways to cope

Perfectionism and ADHD may seem like opposites, one focused on doing everything flawlessly, the other marked by struggles with focus, organisation, and impulse control. Yet for many people, the two overlap in surprising and often frustrating ways. Perfectionism can push someone to set unrealistic standards, while ADHD can make it difficult to meet those expectations, creating a cycle of stress, self-criticism, and burnout.

In this blog, we’ll break down what perfectionism and ADHD look like, how their symptoms can blend together, where they differ, and how to cope when you’re dealing with both. Whether you’re trying to better understand yourself or support someone else, this guide will help you recognise the patterns and find healthier ways to manage them.

What is perfectionism and Adhd?

Perfectionism is often described as the drive to do things flawlessly, setting exceptionally high standards and scrutinising every detail of your own performance. While striving for excellence can be a positive trait, perfectionism exists on a spectrum. In small, balanced amounts, it can motivate growth. But when the pressure to be perfect starts to dominate your daily life, this once-helpful tendency can become toxic, taking a toll on your mental well-being.

What are the symptoms of perfectionism?

Perfectionism often shows up in a few key ways.

• First, perfectionists tend to be far more self-critical than high achievers, zeroing in on mistakes rather than celebrating progress. They also set goals that are unrealistic from the start, unlike high achievers who aim high but stay grounded in what’s attainable.

• Surprisingly, perfectionism can lead to procrastination. The fear of not producing a flawless result can make someone delay tasks altogether, focusing so much on the outcome that it creates anxiety and avoidance.

• Another common sign is relying heavily on approval from others, valuing external validation more than personal growth or effort.

Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a neurodevelopmental condition characterised by ongoing challenges with focus, hyperactivity, and impulsive behavior. Diagnosing ADHD can be tricky because its symptoms often overlap with those of other conditions, including anxiety and mood disorders. ADHD can also go unnoticed until later in life, with symptoms sometimes weaving in and out of an individuals life, making it difficult to structure a diagnosis in childhood.

What are the symptoms of ADHD?

• Impulsiveness: People with ADHD may act quickly without thinking through consequences. This can show up as interrupting others, making snap decisions, or difficulty waiting their turn.

• Trouble multitasking: Switching between tasks can feel mentally draining. Trying to juggle several responsibilities at once might result in everything feeling half-finished or chaotic.

• Trouble coping with stress: Everyday stress can feel amplified. Managing pressure, deadlines, or unexpected changes may become overwhelming more easily than for others.

• Difficulties focusing: People with ADHD can struggle with focusing on a task unless they are very interested in and engaged by it. Their mind may wander continually onto unrelated thoughts, distractions or tasks, which makes sticking to one task difficult.

  
  

do perfectionism and adhd overlap?

ADHD and Perfectionism have many overlapping features which we will explore below:

• All-or-nothing thinking: Both ADHD and perfectionism can push someone toward extremes. If something isn’t flawless, it can feel like total failure, making it difficult to appreciate progress or partial success.

• Fear of failure and letting others down: People with ADHD often know when they’re struggling but may not know how to fix it. Over time, this can grow into chronic worry and a deep fear of making mistakes. In response, individuals begin to develop perfectionistic behaviours as a way to avoid embarrassment or negative outcomes.

• Relying heavily on external validation: Both perfectionism and ADHD can lead someone to depend on others’ approval as a measure of worth, especially when internal self-confidence is shaky.

This can make both disorders feel as one, with many ADHD'ers experiencing perfectionist behaviours and tendencies. To assess what elements are affecting you, breaking them down and understanding where its coming from is essential, which we will explore later in this blog.

What are the differences between perfectionism and adhd?

After taking a look at the similarities, you may think Perfectionism and ADHD follow an intertwining pattern of symptoms. Yet, when focusing into each symptom we can understand the different ways individuals with ADHD or Perfectionism may react to them.

• ADHD often makes it challenging to focus, stay organized, and follow tasks through to completion. Perfectionism, on the other hand, pushes people to set extremely high expectations for themselves, leaving almost no room for mistakes or imperfection.

• When it comes to behavior, the two can look very different. ADHD is often associated with impulsivity, acting quickly or spontaneously, while perfectionism tends to involve careful, rule-bound behavior aimed at controlling outcomes.

• At their core, the drivers behind each are distinct. Perfectionism stems from an internal, anxious push toward flawlessness and meeting rigid standards. ADHD, however, is a neurobiological difference that affects executive functions such as attention, organization, and impulse control.

Now lets dive into how to cope with each disorder.

How do you cope with perfectionism and adhd?

To overcome both perfectionism and ADHD we can look into similar coping mechanisms:

• Establishing a routine and setting achievable goals: For ADHD, establishing a routine can help manage daily tasks including, waking, sleeping, eating, work scheudles and deadlines etc. Similarly for Perfectionism, establishing a routine allows for a structure to see where you are within your task and whether you can achieve it within that time frame, making them more achieveable.

• Relaxation techniques: Relaxation techniques can help both ADHD and Perfectionism. With breathing exercises to release any stress and anxiety, alongside positive affirmations allowing for a positive sense of self-worth.

• Mindfulness: Mindfulness is the ability to simply notice, without judgement, what we are thinking and feeling in the present moment. Perfectionism, self-criticism and the strong impulses or emotions that come with ADHD are all simply momentary biological impulses. Being able to 'zoom out', not see thoughts as facts, and to allow emotions to wash over us without acting on them can all help.

• Focusing on meaning: A key for both disorders may lay within focusing on the meaning of your matter. Whether this be the impulsive demands of ADHD or the obsessive desire of completion for Perfectionism. By stopping and asking yourself, is what I'm about to do meaningful? May reduce impulsiveness and refrain from excessive focus on a tasks that do not require as much thought.

If you found this blog helpful, know what we have others covering various ADHD and mental health related topics. We also offer ADHD assessments for adults to help tease out whether you might be struggling with ADHD, perfectionism or both with expert clinical psychologists.

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