Perfectionism and Anxiety: Overlap and 3 ways to cope

Perfectionism and anxiety often go hand in hand, quietly reinforcing each other in ways that can be difficult to recognise. While striving to do well can be motivating, the pressure to be flawless can quickly turn into constant self-criticism, worry, and emotional exhaustion. In this blog, we’ll explore what perfectionism really is, how it differs from healthy achievement, and the ways it overlaps with anxiety. We’ll also look at common signs, related anxiety disorders, and practical strategies that can help break the cycle and support your mental wellbeing.

What is perfectionism?

Perfectionism is commonly understood as the urge to perform without fault, marked by extremely high expectations and intense self-criticism. Although aiming for excellence can be beneficial, perfectionism lies along a continuum. When kept in check, it can encourage improvement and achievement. However, when the need to be perfect begins to control everyday life, it can shift from a strength to a harmful pattern, negatively affecting mental health.

What are the symptoms of perfectionism?

Perfectionism often shows up in a few key ways.

• For starters, perfectionists tend to be much harder on themselves than high achievers. Instead of noticing progress, they fixate on what went wrong. They also set goals that are almost impossible to reach, while high achievers aim high but keep their expectations realistic.

• Interestingly, perfectionism can actually lead to procrastination. When there’s so much pressure to get things just right, the fear of falling short can make it easier to avoid starting at all. This focus on the final result can quickly turn into stress and overwhelm.

• Another common sign is placing too much importance on other people’s approval, valuing praise and validation more than personal growth, effort, or learning along the way.

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What is Anxiety?

Anxiety is often described as a feeling of fear or unease, and it’s something everyone experiences from time to time. In many situations, feeling anxious is a completely natural response. At manageable levels, anxiety can help us stay alert, focused, or cautious when it matters. However, when it becomes overwhelming or lingers for long periods, it can start to interfere with everyday life. We can also begin to experience anxiety when there is no real threat or danger, meaning it can spiral out of control. Now we understand what anxiety is, lets take a look at some common symptoms of anxiety.

What are the symptoms of anxiety?

• A fluttering or uneasy sensation in your stomach

• Feeling dizzy, faint, or light-headed

• Tingling sensations, such as pins and needles

• Restlessness or difficulty sitting still

• Headaches, back pain, or general aches and discomfort

• Rapid or shallow breathing

• A racing, pounding, or irregular heartbeat

• Excessive sweating or sudden hot flushes

• Trouble falling or staying asleep

• Clenching or grinding your teeth, particularly at night

• Nausea or feeling unwell

• Changes in how often you need to use the toilet

• Shifts in libido or sex drive

• Experiencing panic attacks

Anxiety can come in many shapes, form and sizes. Lets take a quick look into the different types.

There are many different types of anxiety disorders such as:

• Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD): Ongoing, excessive worry about everyday situations

• Panic Disorder: Sudden and intense panic attacks, often with physical symptoms

• Social Anxiety Disorder: Strong fear of social situations or being judged by others

• Specific Phobias: Intense fear of particular objects or situations, such as spiders or heights

• Agoraphobia: Fear of situations that may feel difficult to escape or unsafe

• Separation Anxiety Disorder: Extreme fear of being away from loved ones

• Related conditions: Anxiety can also be linked with conditions such as OCD and PTSD

  
  

To learn more about the different anxiety disorders, stay tuned for future blogs.

do perfectionism and anxiety overlap?

When you’re always striving for impossible standards, it’s easy to become trapped in a loop of overthinking. Even when you succeed, it rarely feels satisfying because the goalposts keep shifting. This is where perfectionism and anxiety intertwine. Over time, this constant self-imposed pressure can lead to ongoing anxiety symptoms, such as restlessness, irritability, and mental fatigue. Perfectionism and anxiety often feed off each other. The harder you try to control every outcome, the more anxious you may become about potential mistakes or what could go wrong.

Perfectionist tendencies often show in Anxiety disorders such as:

• In Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), perfectionistic thinking often intensifies constant and exhausting worry. There may be an ongoing fear of making mistakes, letting others down, or not being “ready enough,” even in everyday situations. This creates a mental loop of “what if” scenarios, where the mind continuously scans for potential problems and tries to plan for every possible outcome. While this hyper-vigilance is meant to prevent failure or criticism, it usually has the opposite effect, keeping anxiety high and making it difficult to feel at ease or confident in your choices.

• In Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) , perfectionism can appear as strict routines, repeated checking, or an intense need for things to feel “just right.” These behaviours aren’t simply about being tidy or organised; they’re driven by a need to ease anxiety and prevent feared or imagined consequences. Not everyone who struggles with perfectionistic tendencies has OCD, but for some people there is a clinical overlap. The key factor is noticing when these patterns start to disrupt everyday life, increase distress, or impact emotional wellbei

This overlap can make the two conditions feel intertwined, with many perfectionists also experiencing anxiety-related behaviours and patterns. To better understand what’s affecting you personally, it’s important to break these elements down and explore where they stem from, something we’ll look at next.

How do you cope with perfectionism and anxiety?

To overcome both perfectionism and anxiety we can look into similar coping mechanisms:

• Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is particularly helpful for addressing the link between perfectionism and anxiety. It works by helping you identify unhelpful thought patterns, such as all-or-nothing thinking, fear of mistakes, or constant self-criticism, and replace them with more balanced, realistic perspectives. CBT also supports the development of healthier coping strategies and helps you change how you respond to triggers, reducing the pressure to be perfect and easing anxiety over time.

• Relaxation techniques: Practising mindfulness can be especially beneficial when perfectionism and anxiety go hand in hand. By becoming more aware of how you respond to your own expectations and self-critical tendencies, you can learn to stay grounded in the present moment rather than getting caught up in worry or fear of judgment. This awareness can soften the impact of perfectionism, particularly in social situations, and help reduce anxiety over time.

• Self-compassion: This involves responding to yourself with kindness and understanding during challenging moments, rather than defaulting to harsh self-judgement. For people who struggle with perfectionism, this self-criticism can significantly heighten anxiety. Learning to encourage yourself in the same way you would support a friend, by recognising that imperfection is a normal part of being human, can ease internal pressure. This might sound like gently reminding yourself, “It’s okay to make mistakes,” or “Everyone finds things hard sometimes.”

If you need support, we provide specialist therapy including CBT for anxiety and perfectionism, as well as upcoming self-help courses and workshops.

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